Monday, February 25, 2008

where we live... in heart.

my mom. my dad.
once upon a long while ago.
she this timeless grace of beauty.
he the charmeur. that made her heart melt
and my heart too.
"It's Spring fever...
You don't quite know what it is you do want
but it just fairly makes your heart ache,
you want it so."
- Mark Twain -



maybe the one thought,

really has nothing to do with the other thought.

i mean, a photo of my mom and dad.

and thoughts of spring.

but i'm a december child.

and counting back time and months,

it must have been a spring fever that brought me

into this wonderful world we call life.


but as i decided to write a line or two tonight,

mom just called

and god its always feels good.

in just the way she says

" i miss you...

so i was just thinking of you and wanted to hear your voice. "

and its usually in moments,

that i'm really just missing her and thinking of her too.


and isn't that the wonder of family. of friends. of love.

the way thought can pass thru distance,

even time.


and that thought just made me pull out a book from the shelf

margaret atwood. cat's eye.

when she says...

"time is not a line, but a dimension like the dimensions of space. If you can bend space you can bend time also, and if you knew enough and could move faster than light you could travel backward in time and exist in two places at once."

sometimes i wish that's just what i could do.

here, where i am now. as this woman i am now.

but with the playful innocence of that little girl

that with the years, became this woman.

and at heart, sometimes i still am that little girl

just as i am the glory of a woman.

so maybe we do live in two places at once.

and with our dreams of tomorrow, we make it three.


anyhow.

its been a blur of weeks.

and so many times i wa nted to capture them here.

the sweet moments. the quiet moments.

hushed moments.

just the random thought of moments.

moments that don't matter

and moments that matter most.

but with time, even those moments blur.

kind of like a faded photograph.

once. and upon a time.


tonight,

i sat amongst the midst of my fleurs,

making rings that need to be sent off on little journies,

bringing magic back to life.

yes, bringing spring back to life.

like a whispering reminder,

that's nudging me along the way.

what is it that makes your heart so want these days?

5 comments:

nikoline said...

to write just as you did here. beautiful. my heart was built for longing.

Anonymous said...

Hi Ang...
I hope you're doing well.

I see you're updating your blog, you must be all right. Still, send news sometime.

Chris

Anonymous said...

Yes, a phone call from mom always makes the day brighter, doesn't it? And yes, Spring does create a longing for something. For me, I want to open my windows and feel a warm breeze come in and see COLOUR.

madelyn said...

I miss my dad so much...
he always used to call me even
when he could not really speak
near the end ~ and then
well, we had this shared silence
that I loved so much we were such
kindred spirits:)

I don't know what it is about
you except I sense a shared
....longing and loss ...and these
lines..

bringing magic back to life.

yes, bringing spring back to life.

like a whispering reminder,

that's nudging me along the way.


is exactly where i stand
lately ~

in a very newfragile
place that has such
uncertain feet...

and i feel so confused ...
my heart is demanding i
travel along this path and
my mind is parenting my heart
for the first time ~
worried for it i suppose...

but in the end i really
believe with all my heart
that life...and love...

is meant to be lived:)

I am meeting Susanna in New
York in April and somehow
I wish you could be there
too:)

Have a beautiful day
you wonderful poetess:)

madelyn said...

I shall be back to read your
latest post and comment
but today i have a
very anonyingly busy day ~
four classes back to back:)

(hugs)