Wednesday, February 21, 2007


is it wednesday? already? again?

feeling really tired tonight.

and in more than one way.

between work. the move.

everything is just a bit overwhelming at the moment.

good. but overwhelming.

and i think i'm going to find my way to bed.

i managed to pack for munich

and we won't be leaving as early as hoped

so that means a couple of hours in the office first

and able to take care of a few more things.

it promises to be another long day,

and i really do believe i'll be so happy

when we're back at the hotel

having dinner. relaxing. and hopefully a glass of wine.

i still have to call caro. and ruth.

and of course hope to meet with andrea.

as well as the galerie.

the days and the evenings will fly by.

and then next week,

i hope and i reckon there'll be lots in the office

and then having to get things in place with the move.

financially. technically. physically.

and i believe emotionally as well.

and it's days like this,

when everything really is so overwhelming

and we just don't know how we're going to get it all done

but there's magic in that

because somehow

we always do manage.

anyhow. this is me. saying good night wednesday.

Monday, February 19, 2007

all things are good.

photo for omondieu! by helena kvarnström

closing off the day.

feeling accomplished. and not so accomplished.

didn't get home from work

and then from a meeting with my landlady

until about nine thirty this evening.

i had initially planned on finishing off things for galit

but i also needed to prep some things

that need to find their way to munich with me

later on this week.

i had a sweet order that i took care of after i checked emails

i love it when i can send the fleurs on their journeys

and that's one of the things i've been doing this year,

is making a map of all the places that the fleurs

find their way to.

it feels like planting seeds of magic.

and i just want to watch this garden grow.

but at times, and especially these times,

it's frustrating.

simply because the ideas, the inspirations surround me,

but it's the time that just feels like the battle at the moment.


i managed to fill another garbage bag of things.

and it still doesn't feel like there's a difference to be seen.

i'm trying to be more and more consequent

in what i keep. in what i let go of.

and sometimes i think that this materialistic purging,

is a symbol for an emotional purging.

kind of like an emotional feng shui of sorts.

what i really need is a week at home

just to organise things, sort thru corners.

finally get things up on ebay.

get things filed. of course while enjoying a cup of coffee.

then i need about two or three saturdays of flea markets.

and then a week, just to focus on the office and piles of paperwork.

and more than anything

i need a week off. of nothing.

but i'm saving that until i'm in the new place.

and then of course. a holiday. travel.

where would i go today?

i'd like to think of bretagne. or the tuscany.

maybe a week of greece.

i honestly can't say.

and i know, that i really need a visit home too.

with mom and dad.

but that reminds me of something

that put a smile on my face today.

reading dana's email

and her plans of coming over for a week

in april.

and i'm also looking forward to amsterdam

at the end of march.

even if just a weekend. and a bit of work.

but god it's a beautiful city.

and susan. yes, there'll be photos. i promise.

cross my heart [but hope not to die]

but right now

i think that sleep and bed should be my contemplation.

a glass of red wine beside me

and the hope and promise of energy for tomorrow.

there's a meeting that's going to be draining tomorrow

and i feel like we're behind on everything at work

yet it's going good. the response. the energy it creates.

but the "to do list" is a damn big one.

then back to the apartment again,

hopefully with a few things

that i'll load into the car in the morning.

it won't be much. but simply a few small things.

and then it'll be late again once i'm home

but tomorrow's priority is galit

and then packing

and prepping the rest of omondieu!

i just keep reminding myself

all will be good.

and all is good.

good night.

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

saying good night.

just back from frankfurt. and the ambiente trade fair.
spent the day there with my boss' wife, whom i absolutely adore.
we ended up taking the train from karlsruhe to frankfurt,
so once we arrived back,
we reckoned a bit of shopping could be added to the agenda.
and at the moment. i should be buying and looking for furniture and things,
rather than a new outfit to wear at the inhorgenta trade fair next week.
but we all know what happens, when birds of a feather flock together.
temptation got the better of me.
we finished off the evening with some sushi
and then some blooming teas.
i had wild lover. said to be the pisces tea.
she had oriental beauty. said to be the libra's tea.
finding "my cup of tea" and their zodiacbloom! however,
i should have been drinking the angel of lotus.
and she the charming lover.
sagittarius and capricorn respectively.
and i've absolutely fallen in love with these.
so beautiful to watch the tea steep and literally blossom
in a glass teapot.
i think it could become my evening ritual.
simply watching it bloom. come to life.
and even omondieu! had it's sweet moments today.
i had a phone call from munich,
so i'm to bring a few things along with me.
an array of shirts and fleurs.
there are so many ideas and inspirations in my mind these days.
it's just battling the time to keep up with them.
there's a bit of a vision i gave myself this year,
the dreamer i am. the realist i am.
true to the sagittarian i am.
but i just want to spread a bit more of the magic. and this vision.
andrea and i applied for the modepalast in vienna last night.
an expo event that i think could be interesting for omondieu!
but also the perfect excuse, to finally visit vienna.
and have a fabulous long weekend. of work and play.
fingers crossed that we get accepted thru the jury.
elisabeth has already applied. so fingers crossed for her as well.
but it is time. it's always time.
and i know i'll find the way to create the time.
anyhow. tomorrow promises to be a long day at the office.
a phone call with galit in the evening,
as we weave our way thru more and more ideas as well.
and plans for getting myself to amsterdam in march
to fulfill these ideas.
march is already promising, to be a month of madness.
good madness.
so i better get myself to bed. to sleep. to sweet dreams.
and simply say good night to today.

[photo taken in paris. in october.
and i find myself thinking of him.
and yes. missing him.]

Sunday, February 11, 2007

the first piece...

first i don't write for what feels like months.
and then i overwhelm myself with three writings in one day.
but after a relatively, lesser productive sunday than planned,
i just bid on an auction on ebay.
and may i introduce, the first piece of furniture i just bought
for the new place.
at least the first official piece of furniture i've bought,
since i know how and where my new place is?
i'm not sure if this dresser is going to be in the bedroom,
or in the hallway or in the bathroom.
but i simply know that she had to be.
almost as though she was calling my name.
and that simply made me happy tonight.
now back to sorting thru one more pile of paper,
after the two garbage bins of paper i've just thrown out.
it still doesn't look like it's any less.
i'll just keep reminding myself, that each little bit
is eventually going to make a difference.
i might not see it today. or i might not see it tomorrow.
but i'll see the difference yet.
until then...
loves. much loves.


and just a few random photos...
of the past weeks.
snapshots. here and there.
the walls and space that are soon to be my new home.
the kitchen. the dining room.
but it'll be a bit of my office room as well. i think.
i see the kitchen table.
and can see myself working there as well.
there's comfort and serentity sitting around
kitchen tables.

the living room.
with an old tiled stove.
we reckon this one is over a hundred years old as well.
the dining room again.

i love the way the light falls in thru the windows.

and outside, a cherry tree.

spring promises to be something beautiful.

and in bloom.

i believe this is what made me fall in love with the apartment

the balcony.

imagining sitting outside on summer evenings.

even on rainy days.

quiet. a glass of wine.

conversation with friends. or even just silence.

sabine and me in münchen.

at the hotel.

after a long day.

isabelle and micha

just as we were getting ready to head out

ended up being a perfect evening.

showing off omondieu!


and then coming home and sitting around the fire

outside. on a january evening.

isabelle and me

and yes, just about to head out the door.

caro and the kids.

the weekend in starnberg.

friends. and a most wonderfully beautiful family.

february sundays.

question of the day...

is it really already february?

i keep asking myself these days, where time has gone.

and it feels, like i've been asking myself this question

over days. weeks. months.

in one sense, so much has happened.

and yet, it almost feels as though so much is standing still.

pivoting. rotating. turning. yet standing still.

this is one of the first weekends since december

that i have taken off.

a few weekends ago, i found my way to starnberg

to visit with friends.

the weekend after that, i was at the trade fair in munich.

work has been keeping me busy. maybe more than busy.

leaving the house at around seven in the morning

not getting back until maybe nine or ten in the evening.

and occassionally detouring on the way home

to grab a coffee or a glass of wine with a friend

and simply enjoy the good and the sweet moments in life.

and with all the hustle and bustle of the job,

i'm so forever enjoying it.

seeing how things are unfolding, falling into place.

the cataloge is finished and the first responses from the fair

were all that we had hoped for.

now it's just putting all the other things together,

finishing off the data banks,

the pps system,

bringing the orders on home,

and starting with the next cataloge. already. again.

and i'm filling myself with visions.

of all that this can become and all the things it can lead to.

not just with the new company,

but i find it inspiring and rejuvenating omondieu! as well.

it's just a matter of the time, organisation, endurance, determination

to bring all the ideas together.

but what makes it so much easier,

is having a boss that also sees the visions,

lives and feels the visions.

it's like a mutual language is spoken.

and then, also the team that is a part of this.

smiles, because this is the team behind the project in these photos.

we took these in december

and i've been meaning to post them for a while.

i guess that simply goes to show how far behind on

how much of things in life i am.

i do miss the days that i can simply spend with a cup of coffee,

catch up on blogs,

take the pup out for an afternoon walk,

or head out with the camera and photograph.

but yet, my days at the moment bring other rewards with themselves.

and for that i am thankful.

other new things in life?

the ultimate surprise as my boss came up to me on a monday morning

saying he saw a car and it the first thought that came to mind,

was that it was the perfect colour for our company colours,

and he immediately saw me sitting in the car.

i didn't honestly think that we were ready to contemplate a company car for me

and i considered it just an idea that would disappear as quickly as it arrived.

but the next day, he called me down to the garage,

i hadn't connected the dots as i headed down the steps,

and all the more surprise when i saw a golden mini cooper standing there

and a smile on his face.

we took her for a test drive and i still thought okay, it's just a contemplation.

and patience is always a virtue [reminder to the self]

i had a meeting afterwards and when i came back,

he smiled again, looked at me and said he bought the car.

and the joke these days,

is that we chose the car, to match my phone

of course, once i saw the new dolce & gabbana motorola,

i was in love. and had to have it.

and that was already the joke,

because my boss had already bought the golden baroque chair

because it was also a reflection of my style, of the company

and yes, our colours.

of warm golds.

so the long drive to work at the moment is simply all the more fun,

i play with the navigation system and take myself to far away places

on the drive to work in the morning.

either 65, rue de charonne

that would take me to my favourite café in paris

the tribeca.

or i dream myself away do lago di como.

where would you like to go today?

and this week, i finally said yes to a new apartment.

it's so different than i had imagined it to be.

but there was something about it that simply felt like home.

so the next weeks will be busy with not just work,

but also packing boxes, more purging, looking for furniture

and simply getting ready to move.

hello baden-baden...

here i come.

it's a most charming house.

about a hundred years old.

the landlady has just completed renovated the house,

but there are so many little details, accents

that keep make this house something special.

all the astrological signs are painted and engraved on the ceiling

of the hallway of the house.

the garden that is absolutely huge.

and although in a part of the city, that i normally would never have

thought of moving to,

because it's one apartment block after the other,

the trees in the garden are like a secret wall,

and sitting under the most beautiful balcony, that's all you see.

and then the church is close by,

and one of the things i love most about being here in germany,

are hearing the church bells when they ring and welcome each hour.

and that's what i think i'm going to do today.

sunday. and maybe pack the one or other box.

do more purging.

and maybe drive out to the apartment

sit in her empty walls and simply start envisioning

how things will be.

i'll be starting new with this apartment

so from the couch to the kitchen table,

these are all the things i'll be needing to find.

and there isn't much time to wander from store to store

and i reckon, i'll simply have to take my time

looking for the perfect this and the perfect that.

oh, trying to remind myself again

that yes, patience is a virtue.

damn, that's a hard thing to do.

but i simply guess, that for all the change that has been in life,

there's simply more change to follow.

and it's always the one step that leads to the next.

maybe it's just time to walk forward

with open arms

and embrace all that is yet unknown,

and all that is to come.

and i make a wish.