Sunday, August 20, 2006

wish the day good night.

"sometimes i feel as though my hands are bound. to you.

and it as though you were a prayer. whispered upon my skin.

and yes. i am still bound."

an old photograph.

and old words.

but for whatever reason, they were found again today.

saturday definitely took on a plan of its own.

needless to say,

i broke the promise to the self

and didn't get to the flea market on saturday morning.

granted, i was up. and i was ready to go,

however the arm was back to giving me greif.

i can't recall if i mentioned

that friday morning had me at the doctor's

and a diagnosis of spinal disk deterioration

or something similiar is what the doctor said.

basically, that's what has caused the neuritis in the arm.

nine needles later, and another round of pain killers,

the arm was just doing fine come friday night.

and then there was an amazing dj to blame,

curse and bless with a true blend of bossa nova and house.

patti and i rarely left the dance floor.

it's been a long while since i've been out like that.

i don't think we got home until about five am,

so that really surprised me to be awake when the alarm went off

just two hours later.

and aside from the arm, i really was feeling alright.

but i reckon that was prolly the better decision anyhow,

as i was back up again by nine am

and started working on the wedding photographs

as they needed to be done for today.

i didn't end up finishing with those until eleven pm.

and aside from stepping out for an hour to get groceries,

and taking pup for a walk,

there is no way i would have managed to get them all finished,

had i actually gone and done the flea market.

but the nice surprise in the day,

was running into melanie while getting groceries,

an acquaintance of an acquaintance lady that i know.

and her asking me about photographing her upcoming wedding.

we made an appointment for earlier this afternoon

and i was really hoping that she was going to say yes

after seeing my portfolio.

it would have been a nice surprise to add to the september,

as i wasn't reckoning with any more assignments

beyond anke's wedding on the second of september.

and she did say yes.

making for a very very happy me.

later in the afternoon,

had an appointment with the other bride

and there's always the anxiety as to whether or not

the client really will be pleased with the photographs.

and a moment of relief, when you can see it written on their face,

or spoken with their eyes.

the sunday morning itself was nice. quiet. content.

i'm enjoying the time away from "home"

and staying here at isabelle's.

it's like being able to take a deep breathe of air,

inhale and exhale.

spent part of the morning sitting outside,

drinking coffee and having a cigarette,

going thru old magazines

ripping out pages here and there.

inspirations. and reminders.

and a long talk on the phone with alex.

while i was at my client's,

a wonderful, almost secret mystery in my life

started sending text messages as well.

and this is possibly when i confess,

that they were leaving me with a smile on the face,

and maybe a bit of a blush on the face as well.

something about this man,

that i haven't yet figured out, aside from the curiousity

that he does leave me with.

the curiousity of the voice i hear speaking on the radio.

or of the man behind the words and thoughts,

both written and shared.

but this constant prelude forever feels like one step forward,

just to take one step back.

but it's sunday come monday morning now.

and there's much in this week to promise the self,

and much in this week to look forward to.

however, also much in this week that needs to be done.

so i'll simply finish off this glass of wine,

and wish the day good night.


susanna said...

Oh Angela, I'm sorry to hear about your arm and the diagnosis. I hope our doctor has a solution up his sleeve, something to relieve you of the pain and to eliminate the problem.
The photograph with this post is beautiful, sad and romantic.

Tongue in Cheek Antiques said...

the candence of this piece, your arm and how the day unfolds, how you turn the pages of the magazine with ease and knowing...I love the old images, and your words...

susan said...

oh dear... and after the two hours we just spent, you forgot to mention this! oh my oh my. i hope this means you are better?